In the US military, and I believe through much of American professional circles as well, we are particularly good at criticizing ourselves. No matter how well an operation or job goes, we dwell on the mistakes and faults. This is typically done from a perspective of improving ourselves and not from ill intent but does tend to keep us focused on the negative. This also creates a culture where we tend to provide more criticisms than compliments to those around us. Even when we do praise someone, it has a critical side: “You have done a great job this past week, but you could have done even better if you….”

We must learn to complement our people, let them know how much we appreciate them and their contributions….and leave it at that!

As I grew through the ranks of the Army, I did my best to pay attention and realize the value in complimenting those who worked for me and give them credit and recognition for a job well done. I have several scriptures that became my favorites in inspiring me to recognize and compliment those around me, either in private or public.

Proverbs 3:27, “Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to do it” was particularly meaningful to me as a military leader. I recognized that my position gave even greater impact to complimenting a soldier in my command. Who doesn’t like being praised by their boss?

We have an adage in the military that I learned early and did my best to apply: “Praise in public, reprimand in private”. I correlated that with Ephesians 4:29, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” A person’s ego is a fragile thing and can be irreparably damaged if done so publicly. On the other hand, a compliment given publicly builds up the recipient, as well as the person who gives it, in the eyes of those who witness.

Finally, another lesson I learned in the military is never take credit for the achievements of your organization. Your boss will know who is responsible. If you are part of a successful team, make sure you remember that success comes with each member contributing. Philippians 2:3 says, “Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.”

As Christians, we interact with others every day. The opportunities to see the good works someone else does and praise them for it are many. During my time in the military, I developed a habit of looking at myself in the mirror, usually while shaving, and thinking, “You are going to say something positive to and thank at least six people today.” It was my way of holding myself accountable to complimenting the people that I loved being around. Giving a compliment is easy, costs us nothing but a few moments, and can have immeasurable benefits to the recipient, the giver, and to others who may overhear.

Make a commitment each day to praise and build up our brothers and sisters around us!

Bill Rose