It was a fabulous little 1965 Ford Mustang Coupe. My friend’s father was a retired Ford employee and a Mustang guy. He would find a car, spend the next year or so restoring it, then sell it at his cost to family and friends. The next one was mine! But there was this girl… She was also fabulous. She was so fabulous, that I was concerned that if I didn’t get an engagement ring on her finger, I might miss out. On the same day, I called the Mustang guy to cancel the purchase and called another friend who happened to own a jewelry store. Never having been accused of being overly bright, this was an extremely bright thing for me to do! We have now been happily married for almost 33 years. By the way, we still call the ring “The Mustang”.

Setting priorities is a constant exercise in our lives. We find ourselves pressed on all sides by a myriad of opportunities. Whether school, work, church, family or hobbies, there is no way to fit everything or everyone in! Deadlines, requests, perceived emergencies, and responsibilities jockey for our attention. We seem to live in a perpetual state of guilt, rarely having been able to satisfy the demands of the day and the people in our lives.

In light of those realities, I recently had breakfast with a friend who reminded both of us about the importance of setting priorities based on God’s perspective. Our discussion centered around Romans chapter 12. The words of that letter encourage a number of things. First, we should live sacrificially (it’s not always about us). Second, we should stop measuring our lives using a barometer of superficial values and worldly customs; and think differently. We should mature to the point that our lives focus on Godly values and priorities. Third, we should humbly use the unique abilities we have been given by God to benefit one another. Last, we should be devoted to one another with a genuine and active brotherly love. Our approach should be one that prefers one another! We should look out for one another, share the good and bad with one another, and we should live together in peace.

So, how do we prioritize one another? Do we see our responsibility to our brothers and sisters in an equal or greater way to all of the other demands we have in our lives? Do we make the effort to leverage our abilities to help one another? Do we intentionally give of ourselves to each other, even when it isn’t convenient or when it is hard? How do we view each other in the pecking order of our lives?

Here are a few ways we might be able to “prefer one another” more today and tomorrow than yesterday:

·      Schedule the time. Pick specific windows that will be dedicated to growing a relationship with a brother or sister.

·     Be open. Other brothers and sisters might reach out to you. Be ready to spend time with them.

·     Be honest. There might be real reasons you can’t make a request work, so suggest an alternative.

·     Be realistic. We are family. Family can be challenging. (Don’t kid yourself, you can be pretty tough to live with too!)

·     See each other through God’s eyes. God sees us as cherished family. He wants us to see each other that way too.

Dean Murphy