My husband and I are from very different backgrounds. He was raised in the North; I was raised in the South. He was raised in a stable Christian home with two parents; I was raised by a single mother. He has a sister; I am an only child.

We met in college, got married, and decided we would work on the differences as we went. We have been working on them for more years than I care to think about.

One of things we often do is look back. Sometimes we look back to childhood, sometimes to ponder when we began our lives together. Sometimes I am surprised at the things we learn about each other that, for some reason, we have never shared.

Looking back can be a good thing or a bad thing. I realize there are things in my life I wish I had not done. There are things I wish I had done. The reality is that I can’t change those things.

My son once told me that when he looks back at high school, he wishes he had made better decisions. He said that he could have made better grades, but he just didn’t put forth the effort. He could have not dated one particular girl so long because he knew she wasn’t “the one.” (I’d like to be able to change that too).

I tell him that the most important thing now is to make good decisions on a daily basis. Evaluate your options and your opportunities, give thought to your choices, and think about how your decision will affect the future.

When I get discouraged from looking back, I always think about the apostle Paul. There is no one that had more regrets about his past than Paul. He made some decisions that he wished he could change.

Our introduction to Saul is recorded in Acts 8. He had consented to the stoning of Stephen (verse 1); and “Saul was ravaging the church, and entering house after house, he dragged off men and women and committed them to prison” (verse 3 ESV).

In Acts 9, “Saul, still breathing threats and murder against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues at Damascus, so that if he found any belonging to the Way, men or women, he might bring them bound to Jerusalem” (verses 1-2). 

On his way, the Lord appeared to him and sent him to Damascus where Ananias explained what he needed to do. Saul was baptized and went immediately into the synagogues to proclaim Jesus.

Saul’s past followed him. When he returned to Jerusalem and tried to join the disciples, they were afraid of him. They could not believe he was now a disciple, a believer in Christ (Acts 9:26).

Thankfully, Barnabas took him to the apostles and confirmed the story of his conversion. Saul then began “to preach boldly in the name of Jesus” (Acts 9:28). 

Do you think he didn’t have some regrets as he looked back? Paul (Saul) makes several references to his past. In writing to Timothy, Paul addresses his former sins. He says, “…formerly I was a blasphemer, persecutor, and insolent opponent” (First Timothy 1:13). He then speaks of the grace of the Lord and why Jesus came to earth and that Jesus came into the world to save sinners. Finally, he identifies himself as the chief or foremost of sinners (verse 15).

Paul knew, however, that the past is not what is most important. Certainly, we have to live with decisions and choices we make; but what matters is how God sees us. Look at what Paul says in regard to the future.

• “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come” (Second Corinthians 5:17).

• “…one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 3:13-14).

In a prayer I heard this past week, a young man prayed, “God, please help us get over ourselves.” He continued to pray that we would quit thinking so much of ourselves and concentrate on doing what is right, I think we need to get over ourselves, be obedient to the gospel, and try each day to live a life pleasing to God.

We need to “press on toward the goal for the prize”, heaven.

Sandra Oliver