This quarter, my lessons for my 4th and 5th grade class are on honoring different people. We have studied about honoring God, Christ, the church, our country, and our neighbors. Sunday’s lesson was on honoring parents.
Children this age don’t really seem to have issues with honoring parents. They don’t like the constant “do this, do that; don’t do this, don’t do that”; but they are more willing accept that as the norm. Some children rebel early in life, but I certainly do not see it with the children I teach in Bible class.
The lesson began with their telling me what parents do for them. I had the typical responses: they feed us, buy us things, provide a house, etc. When they had exhausted the list, we moved on to what God’s commandments are about parents. This is when things got interesting.
One of the passages of Scripture we read was from Deuteronomy 21. It is true enough that Deuteronomy is a long list of “thou shalts and thou shalt nots,” but that was part of the point. God makes the laws, and we are to obey them.
In this passage, God tells the people what is to happen if they have a rebellious son, and he won’t obey his father or his mother. The parents are to take him to the elders of his city and tell the elders their problem. Then all the men of the city are to take him out and stone him.
The children were shocked. They couldn’t believe God would authorize such a punishment. This followed with more discussion and explanation, and then we turned to Ephesians 6. The children listed the commands from God: children are to obey their parents in the Lord, and to honor their father and mother.” Fathers are then instructed to not provoke their children and to bring them up in the “nurture and admonition of the Lord.” Here we established the reason for reading the passage in Deuteronomy. God’s command was to be obeyed. He does not authorize stoning for a rebellious child today, but He does demand honor and respect.
Eli dealt with rebellious sons. In First Samuel 2, we read how Eli approached the young men. Verse 25 says, “But they would not listen to the voice of their father.” According to Deuteronomy, these boys should have been stoned. Eli did not obey the commandment of God.
Samuel experienced a similar problem. Scripture says, “Yet his sons did not walk in his ways but turned aside after gain. They took bribes and perverted justice” (First Samuel 8:3-5, ESV). In this case, the elders of Israel went to Samuel. They pointed out that Samuel’s sons did not obey him, but their solution was to request that Samuel ask God to give them a king to rule over Israel. The elders didn’t obey God either.
Honoring parents is a form of honoring all authority. Children honor God when they honor their parents. They dishonor God when they dishonor their parents. This is true because God commands that we honor our parents.
There are three reasons to honor parents. The first is that nature demands it. Paul says, “This is right” (Ephesians 6). Second, God’s law demands it. The Scripture says do it. Third, the Gospel demands that we do it. The passage says, “In the Lord.” The Gospel motivates children to do what the Bible says.
There is a blessing for honoring our parents. The promise is a long and good life. In the Old Testament, long life was proof of divine blessings and a sign of being in God’s favor. There is no guarantee one will live to a certain age, but those who honor their parents have a better life experience. That is because they are doing things God’s way.
Notice something about this command, both in the Old and New Testaments. There is no end to this command. It is forever. Parents don’t stop being our parents when we are grown and have families of our own. They still deserve respect and our support.
Ecclesiastes 12 records the concerns of getting old. Nothing works the same as when the writer was young, If children honor and respect their parents, growing old will at least not carry with it the worry they will be left alone or be mistreated. This is also a command. “But if anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for members of his household, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (First Timothy 5:8).
Whether it is the teens of the 60’s or any age, God’s commands stand regarding honoring parents. As Christian people we must respond to the authority of God to treat parents with respect. Mark 7:9-13 is a rebuke by the Lord to the Pharisees for lack of support of their parents. Jesus says plainly that they will die for their refusal to support them.
Rebellion is a sin. Dishonoring parents is a form of rebellion. Do something this week to show honor to your parents.
Sandra Oliver