I came across the following calendar the other day, and it describes a number of people’s itineraries.  It would be humorous if it were not so true.

“Ye said also, Behold, what a weariness is it!  and ye have snuffed at it, saith the Lord of hosts;  and ye brought that which was torn, and the lame, and the sick;  thus ye brought an offering:  should I accept this of your hand?  saith the Lord.”     Malachi 1:13

“And let us not be weary in well doing:  for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.”    Galatians 6:9

“For we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busybodies.  Now them that are such we command and exhort by our Lord Jesus Christ, that with quietness they work, and eat their own bread.  But ye, brethren, be not weary in well doing.  And if any man obey not our word by this epistle, note that man, and have no company with him, that he may be ashamed.  Yet count him not as an enemy, but admonish him as a brother.  Now the Lord of peace Himself give you peace always by all means.  The Lord be with you all.”     II Thessalonians 3:11-16

“Sorry, I can’t today.  My sister’s friend’s mother’s grandpa’s brother’s grandson’s uncle’s fish died, and yes, it was tragic.”    ~ Unknown

JANUARY:  I hereby resolve to start to church this year, Gotta get over the holidays.

FEBRUARY:  Weather is terrible.  I’ll start when it gets a bit warmer.

MARCH:  Lots of sickness just now.  Got to keep away from those bugs.

APRIL:  Easter.  Big crowds.  They won’t miss me.

MAY:  I’ve been holed up all winter and now that the weather is getting pretty it’s time to hold reunions.

JUNE:  I’ll wait until the baby is older.  How on earth do some folks take their babies when they are just a few weeks old – and then never miss Sunday worship?

JULY:  Boy!  The heat is terrific!  That air conditioner in church gives me chills.

AUGUST:  Preacher’s on vacation.   He will never know I missed.

SEPTEMBER:  School’s started.  Vacation threw me behind in my work.

OCTOBER:  Leaves are beautiful this time of year.  I can worship God outdoors anyhow.

NOVEMBER:  Getting colder . . . can’t stand warm church buildings with a lot of people in them.

DECEMBER:  It belongs to kids.  Anyway, next month is January, I’ll resolve now to start going to church next year.

“tomorrow – (noun) 
a mystical land where 99%  of all human productivity, motivation and achievement is stored.”

Eileen Light