audio study.

It’s Digging Deep Writing week! It’s busy and it’s  kind of a sleep-deprived study marathon, but it’s fun. Here’s a short excerpt from the lesson I worked on yesterday. Most portions are full of questions and scriptures. This was just one little part in which I was on a small soapbox:

• Mothers must be joyful home-keepers. We really need to return to loving to cook, loving a well-ordered home, loving to hold and cuddle babies and loving to read to our children. We need to love the home-crafts that make our homes pretty and fun. But even more importantly, we need to love the showing of beautiful attitudes to our children. To think we cannot have those attitudes of joy in interacting with our children is to accept defeat before we have begun. No wonder our girls grow up in a hurry to get out of our homes and to be with whoever comes along, if we have made our homes situations of stress and power-clutching.
• Boys need to see their daddies be serious students of the word and your son needs to be 100 percent sure that Dad loves to be with him, throwing the ball or hunting the buck. Girls need to be with their moms in the kitchen and that kitchen needs to be a place of laughter. Girls need to see their moms loving daily Bible study and prayer.
• Ironically, I have found that the manipulative/abusive men are generally not the men who want quiet women at home.They are most generally men who want the immodest, boisterous women and they most often want them to bring home their half of the family funding. Teach your girls to reject this mentality and you will be halfway to victory.
• Teach your  boys and girls to wait on the Lord. That’s the hardest part. Tell them these things: “Take a relatively long time for the courtship, even if you think one day, you’d like a short engagement. Don’t be afraid of red flags. Look for them. If he wants you to carry your own bags when you come to visit his parents, see the flag waving. If she cannot keep her hands to herself or if she cannot cover her cleavage and thighs, see the flag waving.”
• I did not say the list would be a quick and easy fix. But, if some of us do not decide to break the maddening cycle of stress and work and money/power chasing, and take time for the important quality time that occurs in the middle of quantity time with our kids, then we will continue to inflict marriage angst on our kids.

I hope you are thinking about doing the study that begins next September with us. It’s the Word! It’s already blessing me. And it’s already making me very sleepy! =)

Cindy Colley

Ask any Christian and they will probably tell you that the most meaningful moments are witnessing someone put on their Lord in baptism. It never gets old!

Here are just a few reasons why baptisms bring such joy:

• Memories. You can’t help but think back to your own baptism, that very pivotal moment when you obeyed the gospel and had your sins washed away (Ac. 22:16).
• Family. A new brother, a new sister. Whoever came up out of that water is now a part of your family, thanks to the uniting blood of Christ (1 Tim. 3:15; 5:1-2).
• Priority. Sometimes a soul is ready to obey the gospel late at night (Ac. 8:25-33). We experienced just such an occasion this week as a dear lady didn’t want to wait a moment longer. It was after 10 pm when she arrived at the church building. I loved seeing the individuals who were willing to come at a moment’s notice to be there for her!
• Rejoicing. The best pictures are the ones that capture that first moment out of the water. They’re experiencing that beautiful “new life” promise (Rom. 6:4; 2 Cor. 5:17) and you can see it in their eyes. And what a contagious joy it is! When you look around at those gathered, you see it on their faces, too (as you see in the photo below).
• Encouragement. Negativity is all around us and sometimes it seems like things are going downhill fast. But every baptism is a reminder that the Word is still powerful, that hearts are still searching, that the church is still growing, and that God’s purpose is still reigning (Mk. 16:15-16)!

We often look forward to the happiness of Heaven. Surely baptisms are a taste of the joy to come and make us long for it even more!

“Look, here is water. What can stand in the way of my being baptized?”

(Acts 8:36)

Look at those amazing smiles!

By Kathy Pollard

WRITING A BOOK

The Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John) tell a story. They follow our Savior from the time of His birth until His resurrection. He lived His entire life for us through the eyes of these writers.

Most stories tell the good, the bad, and the ugly. In these books, there is nothing but good about our Lord, other than the rejection He suffered and the persecution He endured. The bad and the ugly come from the Romans and the religious leaders and their treatment of Jesus and His followers.

Though the writers of the Gospel were led by the Holy Spirit in writing the account of Jesus’ life, they have a part of themselves in the recording of His thirty-three  years on earth. Some of the accounts are found in all four books, and some only one. Each writer directs His account toward a specific group, a group familiar to them: Matthew writes to the Jews; Mark writes to the Gentiles; Luke writes to the Greeks who had become Christians; and John writes to all men. John’s book does not contain many of Jesus’ miracles and none of His parables. He also does not give us the details of Jesus’ birth. Instead, John returns to the beginning of time to show that Jesus was there, creating that which God designed.

So, if four people wrote the story of your life, what would be included? Would there be the good, the bad, and the ugly? If your life was as open and subject to scrutiny as was the life of Jesus, how would you hold up?

There is a book called “Daily Splashes of Joy,” written by Barbara Johnson. She has 365 gems that are inspirational and spiritually uplifting. As you consider someone writing about your life, think about these thoughts from Johnson’s book.

She says, “We should all live as though someone is writing a book about us.” But that thought is nothing new. Jesus said, “You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.”

In speaking of this life, she says, “The journey is sometimes as important as the destination.” I had to think about this, but then I considered the story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15. He decided that his life didn’t mean much. It wasn’t exciting, and the grass looked greener in a far country. So, he took his inheritance and went on his journey. There he “squandered his property in reckless living.” Circumstances changed his life. He had no money, no friends, and even nothing to eat. With a demeaning job of feeding pigs, “…he came to himself.” He made the long trip home and there humbled himself and begged for a job—not his position as the son of a family unit, but as a hired servant. The words he spoke tell us his journey was as important as the outcome. He said, “Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you.” Sometimes it is that way with us. It takes a hard and difficult journey to bring us back to our heavenly Father.

Ms. Johnson says, ”Be kind to unkind people—they need it the most.” We show our wisdom by our good conduct. James says, “But the wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace” (James 3:13-18). In Draper’s Book of Quotations for the Christian World,” he says, “Kindness is love in work clothes.” Just read First Corinthians, and you’ll see just how much work goes into loving kindness.

This leads us to another inspirational quote. “People with a heart for God have a heart for people.” Paul, speaking to bondservants and masters says, “Obey your earthly master with fear and trembling, with a sincere heart, as you would Christ, not by the way of eye-service, as people-pleasers, but as bondservants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart” (Ephesians 6:5-6). Though he is speaking to slaves, as slaves of the Gospel, should we not do the same?

One of Johnson’s splashes of joy really speaks to the way we live our Christian lives. She says, “If we make a mistake in judgment, let it be on the side of mercy.” In Luke18:11-14, Jesus tells the story of the Pharisee and the publican. Both come to offer prayers to God in the temple. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed, “God, I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.” Notice his attitude. It is all about what he did and how “godly” he is. The publican would not raise his eyes to heaven because he did not think himself worthy. His prayer is very different; “God, be merciful to me a sinner!” Jesus proclaimed him to be justified because of his humble attitude. Mercy is about compassion and forgiveness, and this Pharisee shows neither of these.

In order to receive God’s mercy, we must show mercy. Jesus says, “Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy” (Matthew 5:17). In order to benefit from God’s mercy, we must show mercy. If we do, we will live as though someone is writing a book about us. All the thoughts, words, deeds, every aspect of our lives is being recorded in the Book of Life to be read in judgment. Our journey is truly as important as the destination.

Sandra Oliver

In response to the previous article, there’s been a lot of discussion about whether or not Matthew 19:9 really does give us one situation in which an innocent spouse can divorce and remarry with the full blessing of God. I see no way around the passage.  The clause “except it be for fornication” is there for a reason and does not conflict with all the other passages that explicitly state, in various wordings, that marriage is for life. That’s why the exception clause is there. It’s there because marriage is holy and sanctified. Marriage is for life and the one who breaks that vow in fornication has trodden on the most sacred human-to-human vow. He or she (the one who has fornicated) can certainly be forgiven and restored to favor in every situation. He or she can and must be forgiven when penitent. In fact the forgiver(s) will be overjoyed at the penitence. But the restoration to position in the violated home is clearly the one place where the injured spouse is left in a decision-making place. I suggest that the injured spouse is the one human who can discern what is best for the holiness of his/her home at this juncture.

It has been argued that the penitent spouse is often spurned by the church; but, conversely, I have seen the penitent spouse welcomed back into the body with open arms on MANY occasions. The family of God, is ready, willing, praying to be able to forgive. We want that! But forgiveness has never been the same as restoration to position. It is just not the same. The forgiven child molester will not be placed in the preschool again. The forgiven drug dealer and addict will not be hired as the pharmacist. The convicted, but forgiven perjurer/forger will not be the FBI agent again. God allows restoration in the home, but he does not demand it. He demands forgiveness and the Christian wife longs to forgive and have the trust she once had or at least thought she had. But the passage is clear. She gets to discern and decide about the restoration. She often has innocent souls to consider and she alone can look at the past patterns of insincere (or sincere) penitence as she decides.  Many times, the forgiveness and restoration has occurred on multiple occasions and children are suffering. It’s interesting to think about the cycle of lying, fornication, hurt to children, etc…that could prevail in the life of a married man who is a womanizer, for instance, if there were never the Scriptural ability to stop the cycle of injury/restoration. Restoration without some extended consequences and rehabilitation is enabling the addiction.

We cannot take the liberty that is expressly given in this passage away from the innocent spouse. Christ’s words do not negate the passages which state that marriage is a life-long bond. But he does give one exception. That exception does not have to be mentioned each time the life-long nature of the bond is emphasized.

Cindy Colley

During the last few weeks, I’ve tried to help a few women carry the burden of grieving over their husbands’ infidelity. When a Christian woman discovers that the man with whom she has chosen to walk though life, is walking through the most intimate part of life with another woman, the devastation and trauma is greater than that incurred upon the death of a spouse. I believe the Lord knew that the innocent spouse would almost always be the person on the planet who would best be able to discern whether or not a wayward spouse was broken and penitent–whether or not there was a reasonable hope for future fidelity and faithfulness. I believe that’s the reason He grants that innocent one the option (the choice) of divorce and of, one day, marriage again (Matthew 19:9).

As I spoke with one sweet woman recently, she said, “It’s just so hard for me when people in the church think I should just be able to go on as if nothing has happened. They think he’s repented because he came before the church, so I should be able to just go on in our home and be happily married, when, in reality, my husband is unwilling to make substantive changes in the lifestyle that led him down a destructive path. I feel as if they think I am the one who is sinning when I consider divorce, at this point.”

Another woman I met a few months back, wrote this:  “The hardest part was the “advice” of other ministers and Christians that felt I was harsh and unforgiving. But sadly I had suffered in silence for many years and unintentionally covered his indiscretions and trusted his words. The biggest “piece” that people don’t understand is that one mistake is not ‘one mistake’ in an otherwise ‘beautiful marriage’ where infidelity is concerned. It means someone has been lying to you about the most integral and important part of your marriage for months or years and you did not see it. It’s almost like a serial killer who presents themselves as loving and kind to everyone else. That sounds harsh but that’s how it feels. You can’t be a great person but lie and deceive the one you owe the most honesty and respect to.”

Today’s post is not intended to encourage divorce after adultery has taken its toll. I know that, for children and even for spouses who have been subjected to the ultimate pain, there can often be the greatest healing inside the violated marriage. This is the case when there is an acute brokenness over sin and a strong desire to follow God’s plan for restoration; seeking accountability and being willing to pay any price to be holy and have a sanctified marriage.

But I am saying that we, as God’s people should recognize and honor the God-ordained prerogative given the innocent spouse to make that huge call about whether or not to reconcile. We can give counsel when asked. We should pray fervently for wisdom for the hurting spouse. But we should be careful not to subject the spouse who chooses divorce to our harsh judgment. That innocent party is likely experiencing life’s greatest pain as she reaches for her church family. She should be comforted and supported even more than ever before.

God, himself, gave us a picture, through Jeremiah, of the incredible hurt caused by adultery, when he used the physical unfaithfulness of Israel and Judah to allegorize spiritual adultery.  He even spoke of the “return” to God, the one with Whom she had a covenant. He said the return was not with the whole heart, but in pretense.

The Lord said to me in the days of King Josiah: “Have you seen what she did, that faithless one, Israel, how she went up on every high hill and under every green tree, and there played the whore? And I thought, ‘After she has done all this she will return to me,’ but she did not return, and her treacherous sister Judah saw it. She saw that for all the adulteries of that faithless one, Israel, I had sent her away with a decree of divorce. Yet her treacherous sister Judah did not fear, but she too went and played the whore. Because she took her whoredom lightly, she polluted the land, committing adultery with stone and tree. Yet for all this her treacherous sister Judah did not return to me with her whole heart, but in pretense, declares the Lord.”  Jeremiah 3:6-10

Sometimes, the deceit is very deep and the penitence is very shallow. Whatever is the case, the spouse who has remained faithful is given the Biblical right to make a life and eternity decision. His or her family in the Lord should be as accepting of that as is the Lord, Himself.

And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.”  Matthew 19:9.

Cindy Colley

Psalm 32:4b “. . .my strength was dried up as by the heat of summer.”

We were packed and ready to depart but being in momma mode, I took one more sweep of our hotel room to assure we had left nothing behind. It was in that last moment, I spied something. It was so subtle I almost overlooked it. But peeking out from behind the mirror on the wall was the corner of a piece of paper. Out of curiosity (of which I have an abundance), I pulled it out to discover a folded-up note. There, written in unmistakable middle-school font was the following message:

    “Have a Great Day! Don’t let your day be shriveled up like a raisin.”

This out-of-the-blue blessing made me smile. Although I knew I had never read this exact blessing in scripture, I found it quite profound in a very simplistic sort of way. I felt scripture would support such an odd blessing, so I began a scavenger hunt and landed in Psalm 32. In this psalm, David’s sin lingered ever before him and separated him from God. This great divide dried up David’s soul like a desert. I guess you could say, like a shriveled-up raisin and leaving David desperately seeking the refreshing waters of forgiveness.

The truth of the matter is that my sin too separates me from God, leaving my soul depleted. But laying transgressions down at the cross of Jesus offers the life-giving water of forgiveness. So, when sin drains our lives, friend, take heart. Our Heavenly Father’s sweet redemption breathes new life into us. So, allow me to pass on to you my unexpected behind-the -mirror blessing:

                “Have a Great Day! Don’t let your day be shriveled up like a raisin.”

Father God, may we always seek you for the refreshment of our souls.

Blessings,

Rita Cochrane

This past Sunday, a man rolled his wheelchair-bound mother into the auditorium of our church building. As she passed by our pew, I leaned over to tell my young friend Collins that the sweet lady in the wheelchair recently got baptized. Collins said, “Was it hard for her to get in the water?” I answered, “Yes, it was.” It was actually very difficult for her. A couple of nights earlier I watched her slowly make her way up a few stairs to the changing room, flanked by her son and daughter-in-law. Halfway up, they had to give her an inhaler and let her rest. Several of us watched a little later as she came up out of the baptistry water, happy, but hanging on to Neal’s arm and gasping for breath. Her conviction led her to get in the water. Her bravery moved the rest of us to tears.

I’ve seen many other baptisms where it was ‘hard for them to get in the water’ but it had nothing to do with physical limitations. I knew a very vocal atheist who surprised everyone when he embraced and obeyed the Truth. I met a young couple who obeyed the gospel knowing their family wouldn’t approve. (They were actually disowned by their family.) I’ve seen individuals put on Christ only after painfully acknowledging that what they’d always been taught was wrong. I’ve seen people willing to get baptized knowing full well they were going to have to significantly change their worldly lifestyle. You can’t help but be moved by such examples of humility and faith!

These memorable moments have been happening since the very beginning of the church. Can you imagine what Paul must’ve felt as he went from “breathing out murderous threats against the Lord’s disciples” to becoming one of them (Acts 9)?

Every single baptism is special, but I’m especially thankful for those who were willing to overcome obstacles. Perhaps your own conversion story involved something that made it hard to get in the water. If so, I hope you realize that, in addition to making the very best decision of your life, you also inspired others by your courage!

We were buried therefore with him by baptism into death, in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead by the glory of the Father, we too might walk in newness of life (Romans 6:4).

By Kathy Pollard

Until then we encourage you to visit our sister blog, https://www.lordletmegrow.com/freebiblestudy for new material.

WHAT NOT TO WEAR

I get Pinterest emails often with pins about what not to wear at different ages. I’m not sure anyone gives that a second thought the way people dress today. We have truly gone “casual,” even, what used to be the most formal events. Pants have become the normal attire for every occasion for ladies, and men rarely wear dress shirts and ties with their slacks.

This is not a list of things not to wear on our bodies, but this is a list of things we should not wear in our hearts and minds. What we wear on our physical bodies affects our feelings about ourselves, but what we wear on the inside greatly affects every aspect of our being.

I recently read an article by Courtney Carver, and her message struck me as something Christians need to consider. Though her article had no religious content, I think there are an abundance of Scriptures that will support the three things she mentions.

The first thing she suggests is to stop wearing the guilt of your past. I think all of us feel guilty about something in our past. No one is without sin, and no one can escape this life without regrets over past mistakes. The thing we don’t want to do is to let that dominate our lives to the point that we can’t live the life God wants us to live.

Guilt is that feeling of having done something inappropriate, sinful, or having failed to meet some obligation. God gave us that feeling in order to touch our hearts and help us feel remorse or shame for what we did wrong. It is good to have a conscience and feel remorse or shame for mistakes, but living forever with guilt for wrongdoing will destroy a person. Judas is an example of such destruction. He knew he had done wrong, but he took the destructive way out and took his own life. God would have forgiven him, but Judas didn’t choose that path.

King David had a multitude of sins about which to feel guilty. He committed adultery, he lied, and he ordered a murder all for a woman he had no right to have. He even deliberately disobeyed God. His reaction was to repent and ask God’s forgiveness. Did he forget what he did? No, he didn’t; but he moved on. He did not dwell on his past mistakes. How could he do this? He had God’s promise that He would forgive him. Though David had to pay for his mistakes, he still was called “a man after God’s own heart.”

The apostle Paul had a lot about which to feel guilty. He persecuted Christians, but he changed his life. He still remembered what he had done, but he was grateful for the Lord’s forgiveness.

The second thing we should not wear is the pressure to prove ourselves. This equates to trying to be something we are not. Whether good or bad, trying to be like someone else or trying to prove you are a certain way is not what God wants in our lives.

The Children of Israel wanted to be like the nations around them. They wanted a king. Sadly, they caused themselves much heartache because they were not like everyone else. They were God’s chosen people. They already had a king. Their kings led them into idol worship and other sins that defamed the name of God.

Ananias and Sapphira wanted to receive the praise for donating the proceeds from the land they sold for the needy Christians. Sadly, they lied about what they received for the land, and their lie cost them their lives and their souls. They both had an opportunity to repent, but they didn’t.

Sometimes we try by our dress, our actions, our words to make ourselves appear something we are not. Some people want to appear to have more money than they actually do. Some will lie about their education to appear smarter. Some do good deeds for the sole purpose of being praised for their efforts, much like the Pharisees did. Jesus said their good deeds were for the wrong reason, to be seen of men. They wanted to appear to be more righteous than anyone else.

The third thing we should not wear is other people’s expectations and judgments. Why do we try to please others with our choices? It is because we want to be accepted. That is the reason so many young people get into trouble. They do things they know are wrong because they want everyone to like and accept them.

King Solomon wanted to please his wives, so he built temples and altars so they could worship their gods. Pilate wanted to please the people, so he consented to the death of Jesus.

When we belong to Christ, guilt, trying to prove ourselves, and living for others’ approval should not be part of our spiritual wardrobe. We need to be what God expects of us, not what others think. We cannot control what others think, and we can’t really change who we really are.

These are the things we need to “wear.” We need to “wear” an attitude of loving ourselves and the Christian life. We need to “wear” trust in God and trust in who we are as Christians. We need to trust our ability to care about others but not because of how they feel about us. We need to “wear” our passion for living according to what God expects.

The writer of Hebrews offers us the best advice for what we should wear. “Keep your life free from love of money, and be content with what you have, for he had said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you’. So we can confidently say, ‘The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?’” (Hebrews 13:5-6).

Sandra Oliver