What does it mean to be mission-minded? It means you are willing to go wherever people need to hear about Jesus. The apostles left everything when Jesus said, “Follow Me” (Matt. 4:19). (Interesting side note…Jesus said “Follow Me” in 12 different conversations!) Paul traveled the Mediterranean world to spread the gospel (Acts 13-20). The early Christians “went everywhere preaching the word” (Acts 8:4). Today there are missionaries serving in foreign countries and in “mission fields” in our own country. Some have the un-fun job of raising full-time support in order to live and teach somewhere that’s not even their culture. That means they’re stepping out of their comfort zone twice over! Some have taken on multiple jobs just to make it possible to work with tiny congregations who can’t afford to pay a preacher. God bless the mission-minded!

God can use US to bless the mission-minded. What if we all adopted a missionary this Christmas? Here are some ways we could make theirs a little more merry:

• Add them to your prayer list and let them know your family is praying for them every day.
• Send a card of encouragement in the mail (the REAL mail). Include Scriptures that will remind them God sees their efforts.
• Arrange to send them a Christmas bonus. Sometimes churches give their ministers a holiday bonus and this is often used for family gifts or special needs. I imagine there are many missionaries who would appreciate something like that. Perhaps your church family could gather monetary donations to send.
• Send the good stuff. Instead of sending used curriculum that we couldn’t give away for free (not that there’s anything wrong with that, ha), how about sending brand new, shiny, current curriculum and visual aids? You could send a link to an online store and ask them to create a wishlist.
• Put together a care package of their favorite treats. Their idea of treats might be different than ours. They often crave things they no longer have access to (things that we take for granted). Ask what they miss the most and they’ll probably include things like taco seasoning, Crystal Light, and certain shampoo brands. Again, your church family can help. Put out a list of items for everyone to gather and then ship them with an encouraging note.

Bonus points for asking another friend or family to join you in adopting a missionary!

“Go into all the world…” I thank God for the mission-minded who have taken this command to heart, who, in some cases, have literally moved to other lands. They see the big picture and had the courage and faith to take the big steps. God is using them the world over! Let’s zoom in on an individual or two and hold up their hands this season. We can call it the Aaron and Hur Project (Exodus 17:11-12). 🙂

By Kathy Pollard

Enemies. We all have them, and we all struggle with how to handle them. Everyone likes to think, “Hey, I’m an absolutely delightful person to be around!”, but the fact of the matter is, you will have enemies. No matter how kind, soft-spoken, gentle, or peaceable you strive to be, there will be those who, for some crazy reason, feel they absolutely have to be at war with you. Honestly, these people can drive you nuts! You go to them and try to make peace, only to make matters worse. You examine and re-examine the reasoning for their anger. You mentally dissect all conversations and interactions, trying to make sense of a war you never wanted. How do you come to peace with an enemy? I don’t have all the answers, but I do have God’s word to shed light on our common struggle.

Examine yourself thoroughly and honestly for any fault on your part, and if you find fault, humbly apologize and strive to make restitution.

Let’s be honest, most of us (if not all) struggle with foot-in-mouth disease. Words slip out and oops, they were stronger, sharper, and less kind than we intended. Sometimes we can even say something that we think is completely benign, only to discover the person we were speaking with took great offense. James 3:5 notes, “…the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet it boasts of great things. See how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire!” Oh the fires of hurt feelings that have been set ablaze by the tongue! When we give ourselves a spiritual check-up, the tongue is a great place to start.

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Ok, you’ve done your spiritual check-up and honestly cannot find any fault on your part, what do you do now?

Here’s where it gets uncomfortable. You need to gently, lovingly, sincerely speak with them one-on-one and try to come to peace together. How many wars have ignited over a lack of communication? Oh your heart will be pounding, your palms will be sweaty, nobody likes these conversations! But if you can come together and find peace, it’s so worth it! You both may have been making things bigger in your head than they actually are. We women are kind of famous for this! In the times when I’ve had to do this, I have found that praying for wisdom, quick ears, and a slow tongue (James 1:19) really helps put my heart and nerves at ease and gets me in a right frame of mind. You just might be surprised to come out of your talk hugging and praying together!

So what do you do when you discover you have a true enemy?

I’m talking about someone who has no desire for peace, who takes delight in being cruel to you, and has gone so far as to start an all out war against you. These people exist. You can’t stop them because they don’t want to be stopped. What can you do?

I’ve been in this situation before, and the first thing you need to do is pray, pray, pray! There’s something that happens when you humbly pray for an enemy–they become human. Sometimes the actions of an enemy can become so hurtful, the pain is all we can see when we are around them, or even think of them. Prayer helps put enemies back in human form, which can lead to compassion for their frailties. Perhaps your enemy has some anger issues, or perhaps they never learned how to deal with their emotions on an adult level because they were traumatized or abused as a child. These things don’t excuse their sinful behavior, but that’s not your problem. Feeding the fires of your anger and possible festering hatred toward an enemy absolutely is your problem. Finding ways to feel compassion for an enemy through prayer can help quench your anger and stop hatred before it can start.  You cannot control the way others treat you, but you can absolutely, 100% control the way you treat others, even those who hate you. I have found that prayer, while not ridding me of an enemy, takes the fire of anger out of me, the one I’m ultimately responsible for.

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Once you have gone to God in prayer, sometimes you need to speak with a friend. Now before I go further, I want to emphasize that there is a fine line between seeking the counsel of a friend, and outright gossip and slander. Do not allow yourself to fall into the sin of gossip, “Be angry, and yet do not sin”. (Ephesians 4:26) With that said, sometimes it’s good to seek the counsel of a friend, but choose that friend wisely. “Iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.” (Proverbs 27:17) A wise Christian friend can help you see things from a different perspective, and possibly help you find a solution.

And what happens if there’s no solution? Perhaps you are experiencing a “turn the other cheek” moment.

“But I say to you who hear, love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you. Whoever hits you on the cheek, offer him the other also…” Luke 6:27-29a

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sat in Bible classes–wonderful, wise Bible classes–that centered around, “…if you are presenting your offering at the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go; first be reconciled to your brother, and then come and present your offering.” (Matthew 5:23-24) These classes prick my heart, as they should, and once again begins the litany of “Oh boy, did I handle this old situation right?” I want to set your conscience clear! If you have truly, sincerely, prayerfully considered a situation where someone is upset with you, or is truly being an enemy, and if you have striven to resolve the conflict to no avail, you are in a “turn the other cheek” situation, and once you have turned the other cheek, LET. IT. GO!!!! Free your conscience!!! Romans 12:18 states, “If possible, so far as it depends on you, be at peace with all men.” Note that it says, “…so far as it depends on you…” There’s not a thing you can do about an enemy who has no desire to repent of hurting you, so turn your cheek and walk away! Continue to pray for your enemy? Absolutely! But continue to beat yourself up mentally for a conflict you have no control over? This can only lead to churning up old hurts and old anger, and as Christians, we are to strive toward the path of light. As Christians, we have too much work to do to allow an enemy to take up valuable mental space in our heads.

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Part of dealing with an enemy is to be “…shrewd as serpents and innocent as doves”.  This was Jesus’ advice to His apostles in Matthew 10:16, knowing that they would meet enemies of their own. Jesus also added, “But beware of men, for they will hand you over to the courts and scourge you in their synagogues; and you will even be brought before governors and kings for My sake…You will be hated by all because of My name, but it is the one who has endured to the end who will be saved” (V.17-18, 22). Jesus knew that His followers would be hated for no other reason than for being faithful Christians. There are people in our very congregations who cling to worldly lusts, and when confronted with Biblical truth in a sermon or Bible class, they will turn like rabid wolves, seeking to devour any and all who dare prick their conscience. They can become angered by something as simple as someone simply living a life of purity and refusing to condone sinful behavior. When this happens, remember that “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger” (Proverbs 15:1). Be gentle with this brother or sister, you never know when your gentle answer may soften their heart and make them receptive to change. However you interact, be sure that you keep your anger in check and sin not!

As we strive to walk our Christian path, it’s important to remember Jesus lived a perfect life, yet he had enemies. He did nothing wrong, yet was hated. Sometimes living a wholesome, Christ-centered life is going to create enemies for you. When this happens just remember that you are not alone; in fact, you are actually in great company! Just keep your eye on your eternal goal and continue to be a light to the rest of the world, just as Jesus is our Light!

Karla Sparks

“Can I help you?”

“How are you ma’am?”

“Good…How ‘bout you?”

“Pretty good…Listen, we just came out to ask if you’ve got some sort of well pump or something that would make a big spewing kind of sound…”

“Well, no. We don’t have a well and I can’t really think of any sound like that around here. Why?”

“Well, is there anything out here that would let off steam or hiss or…” (at this point, the officer make a big sound)… “PSHHHHHHH!”

“Well, sometimes when I am jogging out on the road, I think my air conditioner is a bit loud, but why? Did someone send you out to see if I have a well pump?”

“Well, actually not a well pump. Actually (pause…pause) somebody reported that you have a meth lab.”

“…Excuse me…but did you say ‘a meth lab?’”

“Yes ma’am. A meth lab.”

“Sir, would you all like to come in my house?”

“Well, really ma’am…she didn’t think it was in your house. She says you are running a meth lab in that little cottage. She pointed straight to that little house in your back yard.”

“The cabin?!! She thinks we’re running a meth lab in the cabin?!”

(See, at this point, the conversation was getting to be very surreal to me. This was starting to seem like something from a bizarre dream, where you wake up and think, “Oh wow! That was weird. Why’d I dream that?”)

“Yes ma’am,” he responded, jerking me back to strange reality.

“Well, then do you want to come in the cabin?”

“Well, ma’am, we can tell this is not going to be a drug bust. In fact, we’re really sorry we scared you. It’s probably a little unnerving when we drive up. I guess the main thing now is…well, we’re kind of concerned about your elderly neighbor back on the street behind you. She’s pretty sure you’re running a meth lab. In fact, she fell in my arms and got all emotional when she realized I was going to come check it out.”

“You mean she cried?”

“Yeah. Do you think you could maybe keep an eye on her—maybe go and check on her and make sure someone’s looking after her. She could have had a stroke or she might need some medical attention. I’m not a doctor, but maybe she needs to go see one. Something’s just not right.”

“Yes. I will see about her. Maybe I can find out if she has kids and if they are checking on her. I’ll try to put her closer neighbors on alert and make sure they keep an eye out. I’ll take her a loaf of bread and check on her myself, too.”

“Hello. I’m your neighbor.”

“Did you say you’re my neighbor?” she said with a hard stare.

“Yes ma’am” I’m the one… you know with the cabin… where the sheriff came out yesterday?”

“Thank the Lord!” she said with a great sigh of relief in her voice. “Thank the Lord they did! Why on earth are you running a meth lab, anyway?”

“Oh Ma’am. I’m NOT running a meth lab. I don’t even know how to run a meth lab and I surely don’t want to market any meth.”

“Well, how do you explain that terrible, awful smell that comes from that cottage down there?”

“Well, I haven’t smelled anything, but what does it smell like?”

“Well, I never smelled anything like it before…It’s a strong and very terrible smell. I mean it’s awwwful! It’s just sickening.”

“Well, I really don’t know what you could be smelling.”

“Well, if you don’t know anything about it, you had better ask your husband!”

“Well my husband isn’t running a meth lab, either. My husband is a good man.”

“Well, he may be a good man, but still…”

“Well, ma’am, I have a good idea. Why don’t you let me walk you out to my car and you can go down to the cabin with me and you can go in and see for yourself.”

“No. I don’t think that’s a good idea. I have a hard time walking and I’m in poor health. I don’t think I want to do that.”

“Well, then, I don’t know how I can make you believe that our cabin is just a little guest house. It’s just extra rooms…you know…for people to come and stay.”

“Well, who’s staying there now?”

“Well, nobody at the moment. It’s just for guests, you know.”

“Oh, well I have extra rooms, too. I know what extra rooms are for.”

“Well, I guess I’ll be going along now, since I’m not convincing you.”

“Yes. That would be very good. I wish you would.”

“Well, here’s some chai and the directions are right on this little card. It’s really good stuff.”

She eyed the jar carefully and said, “No I won’t keep that. You just take that on back with you.”

“Well, will you at least keep the card so you can call me in case you need something?”

“Well, I’m fine,” she snapped. She took the little card and gingerly held it between the tips of her thumb and forefinger, as if it were a bomb ready to detonate at the least little jiggle. “I don’t need a thing.”

“Do you have children who come to see you often?”

“Oh yes. My son looks in on me every day. He takes good care of me and I am just fine,” she said, with an emphasis on the “I”, as if to intimate that it was I who needed someone to “look in” on me.”

“Well, goodnight then.”

“Good bye.”

1. There are some things that are simply beyond my control. Perhaps that’s why the apostle Paul said, “If it be possible, as much as lieth in you, live peaceably with all men” (Romans 12:8). Sometimes, for various reasons, it is just not possible.
2. Sometimes people have a false sense of security. This woman kept reiterating to me that she was “just fine.” Sometimes, just as she thought she was physically and mentally sound, people think they are spiritually “just fine,” when, in reality, they may be very ill. “Because thou sayest, I am rich, and increased with goods, and have need of nothing; and knowest not that thou art wretched, and miserable, and poor, and blind, and naked. I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment, that thou mayest be clothed, and that the shame of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine eyes with eyesalve, that thou mayest see” (Rev.3:17,18).
3. Sometimes people refuse the very help they need the most. What can you think of that this woman really could use more than caring neighbors who are willing to look in on her and see to her needs? Yet this is the very thing of which she is most afraid. Often, people need the Lord and his people desperately, yet they fear the commitment, the changes and the holiness that will ultimately save their souls.
4. Often, people make the evidence fit their hypotheses rather than making their hypotheses based on the evidence. I’m quite sure that this woman’s “evidence” was fabricated by some sort of dementia. But, in spiritual matters, we often let our preconceived ideas lead the evidence rather than allowing evidence to lead our ideas.
5. I can’t ever tell what a day may bring (Proverbs 27:1). I must be ready to face the challenges of life, whatever they may be, head on, with faith, each day.
6. The Golden Rule never leaves me wondering—how to treat the elderly, how to treat the misguided sheriff, whether or not to contact this woman’s son, etc… It’s universal in its applicability and it’s very easy to figure out its demands. This comes in very handy, especially in situations that are reactive (where you have to give a reasonable response very quickly) rather than pro-active.

So, anyway…what in the round world?

Of all the wondrous aspects of worship God has given us, I have to say my favorite is worshiping Him in song. When done right everyone is included, everyone is together, everyone is one mind, one body worshiping the almighty God in love and spirit. When not done right, our soul is not edified and God is not glorified. Now, when I say “not done right”, I do not mean that the song was too high or too low. I also don’t mean that the song leader was off key or that a rogue soprano was screaching so loudly it threw everyone off! Singing “not done right” occurs when our minds and our hearts are not fully engaged. God is not honored when we sing “Hallelujah, Praise Jehovah” while our minds are mentally choosing which restaurant we’ll dash off to after the last “amen”. When we sing, “Oh How I Love Jesus” and our minds are drifting to the scuff we just noticed on our shoe, how did it get there, maybe it’s time to go shoe shopping, hey maybe I should run to the mall later, oops…”because He first loved me!”, we have missed an opportunity to sing of our love for Jesus.  Our worship is a shadow of what it ought to be when our hearts and minds are not fully engaged, and God is not glorified to the extent He deserves.

Do we fully grasp the beauty of the hymn “A Common Love”? In a world of discord, hatred, and division, this song truly exemplifies what the Lord’s church ought to be, and oh the bliss when we fulfill God’s vision in John 17:22-23, “The glory which You have given Me I have given to them, that they may be one…” When we’re singing in worship, we are to be one organism, with one heart and one purpose, connected by the divine, common thread of our love for God. We share a common love for each other, our song is a common gift to the Savior, and we are connected by a common bond of Christian love holding us to the Lord. We are strengthend with a common strength of God’s love when we’re weary, we share a common hope for tomorrow that no man can ever take away, and we share a common joy in the beautiful truth of God’s Word!

In a world that loves to scream at the top of its’ collective lungs that there is no God, I always feel spiritually empowered when we sing, “Our God, He Is Alive”. This is a hymn that shouts our faith from the mountaintops, hushing the enemies of God. This is a hymn that lovingly shines a light to those in darkness, lost and afraid. Yes, there IS a God! Yes, He is very much alive! And it is in Him that we live, and through Him that we survive! To those who are weary, this hymn is a celebration of faith. To those who are weak, this hymn gives strength! Go ahead world and cry your empty cries of disbelief, we know that there is beyond the azure blue a God concealed from human sight. This God, whose Son upon a tree, a life was willing there to give, that He from sin might set even you, oh athiest, free, if only you will turn to Him. For there is a God, and He is very much alive!

Life can be difficult. We have our ups and we have our downs. Certain hymns can  help cheer us through the storms of life. I remember being smack dab in the middle of a howling storm of doubt and fear, when “Standing On The Promises Of God” really struck a deep cord with me. It reminded me that I could prevail, by the living Word of God! God was with me! His promises are firm and never fail! There is no stronger ground to stand on than the firm foundation constructed upon the enduring promises of God. And you know what? One day that howling storm did pass. During my storm, this was a very melancholy hymn, but after the storm, it became a declaration of thankfullness and relief that by the living Word of God I DID prevail, and oh how thankful I am for His promises.

It is during life’s storms that we can also grow in appreciation of “It Is Well With My Soul”. Life is wonderful when peace, like a river, attends our way. But there are times when sorrows and sea billows will roll. We are truly blessed when through faith, we can honestly declare that in times of both peace and sorrow, it is always well with our soul. And once the storm passes and peace is once again restored, that peace will be so much sweeter, and our faith will be that much stronger. I love how the song shifts from earthly sorrows to the cross. Our sorrows cannot compare to the sorrows that Jesus must have felt as he, along with my sin, was nailed to the cross, and because of Him I bear my sin no more, praise the Lord! Oh then we can look to that blessed day when faith shall become sight. Oh ladies, can you just imagine? The clouds rolling back upon themselves like a scroll, the trump of the Lord sounding, and Jesus Himself coming back to take us all home! May I ever live my life that I’ll always be able to declare this is VERY well with my soul!

The next time you are worshiping with your brothers and sisters, truly look at the words you are singing to the King of Kings. Sing with all your heart, and sing with understanding. Your worship will be enriched, even if you sing off key! And if the song leader leads the song slow, well that just gives you more time to contemplate the words! Our songs are our offering to God, and He deserves our full adoration.

Songs cited:

Hallelujah, Praise Jehovah by Wm. J. Kirkpatrick

Oh How I Love Jesus by F. Whitfield

A Common Love by Charles F. Brown

Our God He Is Alive by A. W. Dicus

Standing On The Promises by R. Kelso Carter

It Is Well With My Soul by H. G. Spafford

Karla Sparks

As a child, I was fascinated with fairy tales. My wild imagination eagerly soaked up those rich tales of magic and adventure. There was one fairy tale, however, that made me frustrated and uncomfortable, The Emperor’s New Clothes by Hans Christian Anderson. It was so incredibly frustrating to me how so many people, longing to be seen as wise, would willingly, blind themselves to common sense. The townspeople, the palace court, even the king himself, were fully entangled in the lies of that tricky tailor who didn’t care about anything but making money. Oh that moment of sweet clarity when one child cries out, “The king is naked!” The crowd pauses, takes a step back, and allows the simple truth to ring out. The pretense is gone, the false charm is broken, and common sense wins again.

As an adult living in a world full of sin, I often feel like that child declaring that the king is naked. Sadly, the worldly crowd delights in the frenzied whirlwind of chaos and sin, drowning out common sense. Somehow abortion isn’t murder, it’s health care for the mother. Somehow science is thrown out the window and instead of two genders, people declare we now have a smorgasbord of more than 50 genders from which to pick and choose! Our modern world teaches that the only existing sin is opposition to whatever debauchery our fellow humans choose to flaunt. The world has thrown up this insane forest of lies, insanity, twisted logic and corruption. This forest is then fertilized with hatred and mockery, and woe to the person who tries to navigate this forest in search of truth and logic. I believe it’s time to take a step back, waaaay back, away from the specific issues, and get to the root of all the problems. Let’s take a basic look at that ugly word: sin.

In the beginning, God created everything and called it good. Man originally had one rule: don’t eat from one tree. Adam and Eve could eat abundantly from every other tree, but that one tree was to be left alone. Instead of remaining at peace in their abundance, Adam and Eve allowed their desire for the forbidden fruit to become entwined with the lies of the serpent, and paradise was lost. One little rule, that’s all they had. Today we tend to rate sins on a scale of “not so bad” to “hideously, horrendously awful”. I mean honestly, what would you rate eating a fruit? Would you equate eating one fruit with murder, or would it be more like a “little white lie”? Oh, but God saw it differently! God knows that sin is corruption of something good, and our loving Creator wanted to shield us from corruption. God warned Adam in Genesis 2:17 that the penalty for eating one little fruit would be death. DEATH!!! Today we suffer the same penalty for our sin, death! No matter the pedigree humans give the sin, it all leads to death.

Ahh, but we have a merciful Creator who took pity on His weak-willed creations and altered that death sentence. He would allow man to place his death sentence upon an animal, thus sacrifice was born. It seems logical to me that the very skins God used to clothe Adam and Eve came from the first animals sacrificed in their place for their sin. How awful to daily clothe yourself in the very reminders of the life lost for one “little” sin.

There was, however, one problem with sacrificing an animal in the place of a human. God created man in HIS image, how can the death of an animal truly take the place of the death of a human? Here’s where Jesus came in! The Great I Am, taking human form, came down to live with the beings he helped create, and allowed them to cruelly and viciously torture and murder Him. All because of one little fruit. One. Little. Fruit. And it is only when we are “clothed with Christ” through baptism that God recognizes His Son’s perfect, ultimate sacrifice for sins WE committed and forgives us. (Galatians 3:27) Is there a small sin? Would you call a sin that killed the Son of God small? Neither would I.

So God calls us to live moral lives. Don’t kill people. Don’t take what doesn’t belong to you.Sex is only allowed within the bond of marriage between a man and a woman. Why do you think God made these rules? Was He just trying to ruin our fun? Imagine living in a world where everyone is a Christian and all couples wait until marriage to have sex. Imagine a world where all couples took their marriage vows with proper reverence and utter commitment. Imagine all children being raised in a loving Christian home, such as they deserve. What a beautiful picture! Alas, we live in a world that loves to distort this beautiful picture. In fact, the world not only corrupts God’s plan, it then tries to turn it into a jigsaw puzzle of choices. “I’ll take this piece with the daddy out and replace it with another mommy.” “Hmm, this puzzle piece with the baby I willingly created makes my puzzle look too busy, so let’s throw that piece away”. In the end, none of the pieces fit together, there are gaping holes, and it’s all a giant higgledy-piggledy mess. Then the world wants to hold that chaotic jumble up and have everyone applaud them for doing such a great job! Every puzzle has a puzzle maker, and that maker has one design for that puzzle. Likewise, God has a plan for us, reasons for His rules, and no matter how loud the world wants to shout that His rules don’t matter, they will ALWAYS matter!

So how does this fit in with my earlier analogy of the Emperor’s New Clothes? We need to see all sin as evil. We can’t shun the teen girl who just found out she was pregnant while indulging the gossip who is tsk-tsking about the situation. We can’t decry the homosexual agenda while quietly excusing rampant fornication disguised as a “love story”. And we can’t bemoan the evils of abortion while we hold on to hatred in our own heart toward someone who wronged us. It’s time to call out all sin for what it is, to strip away the twists and lies of the devil and hate it all. When we don’t, we run the risk of being a hypocrite in the eyes of the world. Yet with our hatred of sin, we do need to remember to love the sinner, because without love, we become a “noisy gong or clanging cymbal”, and no one wants to listen to that. (I Corinthians 13:1)

If our merciful God sees death as a just penalty for eating a piece of fruit, then we need to understand just how awful every single sin is to Him. We need to see sin through the eyes of God, and only then will we realize just how naked we all really are. It’s time to let truth ring out and for common sense to win once more. I think our world just might be hungry for a little common sense coupled with some “truth in love”! (Ephesians 4:15)

Karla Sparks

This confession may make me seem a little bit shallow, but I’ll admit it: it has always been important to me for my husband to think I’m attractive. I love when he looks at me, and likes what he sees, and tells me. After 33 years of marriage, though, I know he’s seen plenty of bad and ugly to go along with the good. I have gone to some pretty dumb lengths to “hide the ugly” from him, and even more so recently because it seems that the older I grow, the less control I have over my appearance. My hair is having a midlife crisis and has decided it wants to be both curly and a different color. My dad’s crazy eyebrows are trying to reincarnate on my forehead, and I have become one of those flush-faced ladies in the freezing church auditorium, desperately fanning with a handful of attendance cards. There’s more, but I’ll spare you those embarrassing details!

But recently, too recently, I realized something. Annoyed by something insignificant one day, I caught a glimpse of my face in a mirror. It exposed a very unattractive me, the me that John sees and knows more than anyone else, and it turned a mirror on my soul. That mirror revealed that while I may have hidden some of my external ugly from him, I wasn’t making much of an attempt to conceal (or eliminate) my internal ugliness, and that particular ugly is 100% within my control. I realized that the effort to camouflage my physical flaws was absurdly inconsistent with what I know to be truly attractive to my husband, and to my God. I saw that it was impossible to be attractive when I am pouting, or unforgiving, or being selfish, or a myriad of other conspicuously ugly attitudes. This is true of my behavior before my friends and family—and the world, as well. It seems that it isn’t just the mouth that “speaks out of that which fills the heart,” (Matt. 12:34) but the face does, as well.

Have some of you faced this same problem? I think it can happen if we are more influenced by the world than we are by His Word. We have to remember that what is valuable to God is so different than what we often value. He considers our heart, not our appearance (1 Sam. 16:7). Our attempts to improve our appearance (or, for that matter, our worldly position…or intelligence…or possessions) is not important to Him, but an inner heart that is devoted to Him, with humility and modesty reflecting that devotion, is of great value to Him (and will soften a husband’s heart, 1 Pet. 3:1-4). Much of Matthew 6 is about hypocrites who give, pray, and fast so that they will be noticed by others. Being noticed was their treasure, and “where your treasure is, there will your heart be also,” (Matt. 6:21). What I’ve come to understand, though I’m still working to remember, is that when my heart belongs to God, I’ll truly want my actions and attitude to reflect His glory, not mine.

The honest truth is that every single one of us can be genuinely beautiful when we come to the realization that there is no makeup so magnificent nor any gold so brilliant that outshines or outlasts the attraction of a genuinely kind, respectful, compassionate, forgiving woman whose soul has been saturated by the word of God. Indeed, the most beautiful women I know may not be beautiful at all in the worldly sense. But they are difficult to see with worldly eyes—because their mind is set on things above, not on earthly things, and they are hidden in Him. That is genuine beauty: the kind that my husband will see, but more importantly, the beauty that my God sees, and loves.

by Carla Moore

She sang in a trio and recorded several songs. She went to see John F. Kennedy in Fort Worth on the day he was assassinated. She once worked for the Federal Aviation Agency and was also the secretary at the McCarty Student Center on the campus of Southwest Texas State University. She proofread and typed many articles on an old ribbon typewriter and indexed library books and answered correspondence, but more importantly—she listened to, studied with, fed and counseled hundreds of college students. She spent many hours with lonely elderly women at local nursing homes and visited with others in their homes. She hosted a weekly Bible quiz at the local nursing home, developing relationships and spiritually influencing the staff and patients there. She was the church secretary for many years, and still journals daily, deftly uses her computer and sends text messages. She thoroughly knows and faithfully uses the Word of God. She tenderly cared for her mother, who had Alzheimers’, from 2000 until her death in 2014. When her husband, my father, began his own journey with the same terrible disease in 2010, she lovingly cared for him as well, until he passed away in 2016. She is my mother, Janice Garner.

Now, she lives alone. She has much time on her hands, but different issues prevent her from being as involved in activities as she was in years past. Though she hasn’t voiced it, I have an idea she feels somewhat invisible to the church. For years, she was the one who people sought out for answers. She was part of “Carl and Janice” but now he is gone from this earth. Most of the time, she sits alone and has had to learn an entirely new normal.

Wherever you worship, there are men and women in similar situations. People who have fascinating pasts, who have been—and still are—so valuable to the Lord, will be quietly sitting in the pews. Unless you take the time to seek out these beautiful people, you may overlook them. Be quick to befriend the shy, quiet, elderly, quirky, awkward and even those who seem difficult. Find out who they are and where they’ve been. Help them to not feel invisible, but instead, show them that they are precious in God’s sight, and in ours, too. You will never regret looking them in the eye, offering a hug and sitting down to learn from them.  They might seem to be “the least of these” (Matt. 25:45) but when we love and care for them, we love and care for the Lord!

Carla Moore