The Wise Woman
Shanna Mathis Anderson
How many times have you sung about the wise man and the foolish man? If you have children or teach a bible class, undoubtedly, you could sing every chorus AND do the hand motions with your eyes shut. As women, it might be easy to attribute the negatives of foolishness that cause the destruction of a house to our male counterparts. After all, do we sing about the wise and foolish woman? Maybe not, but perhaps we should. We can read of both of these women in Proverbs chapter fourteen and verse one.
“The wise woman builds her house,
But the foolish tears it down with her own hands.” Prov.14:1
The wise woman builds her house.
Are you building your house? If you aren’t building, then you must be tearing down. The question that begs to be answered is, “How do I build my house?”
- 1. Love your husband
The scriptures make no secret of the husband/wife relationship. He is to love the wife just as Christ loves the church, and she is to be submissive in everything to her husband. Eph. 5:22-24 When, we as husband and wife conduct ourselves in the home as God has commanded, we are building a strong foundation for our entire family. We support and honor our husbands, they are tender and affectionate toward us, and our children see marriage as God intended it to be. This is a win-win situation.
- 2. Love your children
We are told in Psalm 127:3 that children are both a heritage and a reward given to us by the Lord. It is very natural and easy to have a phileo love for our children, but we must focus on an agape love for them as well. “Whoever spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is diligent to discipline him.” Prov. 13:24 If we really love our children, we will discipline them. Is it always going to be convenient and easy? No. However, if we do not mold them on the front end, much sorrow may fill our hearts on the back end. We are to, “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.” Prov. 22:6
- 3. Love yourself
Yes, I am fully aware as a mother of four that at times this seems downright impossible. 1 Cor. 3:16 tells us, “Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you?” We are made in the image of God, and when we are a member of the church, His Son lives in us. We must treat our bodies and mind as such. We cannot be transformed into a “living sacrifice” if we do not maintain a healthy physical, mental, and spiritual lifestyle.
- 4. Love the Lord
We are to love the Lord our God with all our heart, and with all our soul, and with all our mind. Matt. 22:37 No ifs, ands, or buts, we must put God first if we hope to build our homes. God must be the center of every aspect of our lives. It must be evident to our children and everyone around us that we are a peculiar people (1 Peter 2:9) who live our lives set apart for His service.
The foolish woman tears her house down with her own hands.
When I think about this, I am blinded by a sad mental picture. It leaves me cold and makes the hair stand up on the back of my neck. How many homes have been literally torn apart by a foolish woman’s bare hands? Some may have broken down “wrecking ball” style, but I can’t help but believe that many of those homes were painfully dismantled one brick at a time over a period of years. The good news is this. We do not have to give into Satan and be a foolish woman. God has equipped us with the desire, ability, and tools needed to be that wise woman.
Maybe we should start singing about the wise and foolish woman. In my mind it would go something like this.
The wise woman built her house; did not tear down.
She loved the Lord, her children and husband.
The wise woman walked the straight and narrow way
And the wise woman’s house stood firm.
The foolish woman ruined her house with her own hands.
She neglected the Lord, her husband, and children.
The foolish woman choose the easy path she found
And the foolish woman’s house fell down.